All the World is Mad

It only took 2 minutes and 19 seconds to restore my faith in humanity.

Let me back up a little. This past October I found myself extremely discouraged over a news item that was deemed critically important enough that every major media outlet just had to forgo reporting on any actual world affairs – the cast of Glee had just shattered the Beatles’ Billboard Hot 100 record for most appearances in the chart’s 52-year history. That’s right. Apparently the cast of a television show that was assembled by network executives and who does nothing more than sing karaoke-style cover songs can now be deemed a musical group and is deserving of the acclaim that used to only be reserved for organically-formed musical groups who wrote and performed their own material.

And if the fact that what is often considered the greatest group of all-time had their record taken from them by a bunch of camera-ready twits releasing a batch of overly-cheery renditions of contemporary and classic songs wasn’t bad enough, online articles reporting the story were filled with reader comments boasting insipid responses from the show’s fan-base, defaming the Fab Four and defending Glee’s right to this achievement. I’ve had six months to let these opinions sink in and it is still mind blowing that people actually think this show is worth more than the steaming pile of shit it takes all over the artists they defame each week with their soulless covers (and don’t get me started on the ego the show’s creator has in his responses to bands who refuse to let their music be featured on the show. He seriously acts like they’ve committed treason). I know that this show is to be taken for face value and as nothing more than a form of entertainment, but its following has become so massively blind to said face value that the only hope for this show to cease to be at this point is for it to become so massively popular, it will implode on itself ala Heroes or Ally McBeal.

In reality Glee is more prefabricated than the Spice Girls or any boy band from the late ’90s, but at least those acts had the good graces to sing original material. It may have been crap, but at least it was their crap. Sure, it wasn’t a banner day for the music industry when ’N Sync’s No Strings Attached set sales records, but at least we knew that the album was created the old fashioned way, not just by seemingly hitting shuffle on an iPod, purchasing the rights to the songs that start playing, and then formulating a script around them. Back then the only casualties of this cheapened form of entertainment were the occasional bad cover these acts would sing in concert or at the Super Bowl halftime show (pre-Nipplegate, when television wasn’t afraid to take chances). Today we are treated to a half-dozen crappy covers every Tuesday night. Can we really say we’ve progressed as a society?

At least Muse finally won a Grammy this year.

Shortly after the whole Glee fiasco, as if in some small miracle, I stumbled upon a YouTube video called “Mad Men Theme Song…With a Twist”. The video takes RJD2’s “A Beautiful Mine” (otherwise known as the Mad Men theme song) and puts the lyrics to Nat King Cole’s “Nature Boy” over it. The two meshed beautifully and the lyrics’ tale of a lost boy really plays well when put in the context of Men’s anti-hero, Don Draper. The video even persuaded me to check out some of RJD2’s other stuff (trust me, it’s worth giving them a listen. I recommend “Ghostwriter”). But the real pièce de résistance with this viral treasure was the fact that the song was recorded live by a bunch of young 20-somethings (probably not much older than the actual ages of the cast of Glee) and in one long steadycam take. The beautiful Allison Williams (daughter of NBC News’ Brian Williams) sings the tune. If I say she bares a slight resemblance to Kate Middelton, can she get a fraction of the press the royal-to-be has received since she got her big blue rock?

As of this writing, the video only has a little south of 350,000 views. Your average Glee clip on the other hand is in the millions. If today’s rant has had any moral, it’s that this video (and others like it) obviously deserve more attention than what they get, but I can at least take solace knowing that there are still young, talented, actual musicians out there willing to experiment and try cool ideas for the sheer enjoyment of it. Give it a listen and pass it along to your friends.

Welcome to the Monkey House

So it's finally come to this...

...a blog. Ladies and gentlemen, I am now a blogger. And hey, I only jumped on the trend just a couple years after it peaked in popularity. Way to keep up, Mark. That means I should begin Tweeting on a regular basis by 2013 or so.

To clear any confusion, my previous advoidance of blogging should not be taken as a sign of my being behind today's trends (that would be my lack of understanding what exactly an RSS Feed is). I've read several blogs from time to time both as a favor and out of sheer interest in what the author had to say. My problem is that, for the most part, I think there is a certain level of pretentousness and posturing in people who feel the need to blog on a regular basis - as if they were that person you knew in college or at work who always felt the need to throw in their two cents when they weren't asked or (even worse) when the situation didn't call for it. Even now as I write this, I feel slightly slimy and low about myself because why should I assume you care what I have to say (but please keep reading, I'm getting to a point here).

In fact, if there is one thing about the modern internet age that has gotten me the closest to going into a crazy monkey rage, it is that every jag-off with a computer, a simple understanding of spelling and grammar, and a mildly coherent thought now thinks they are a writer. Seriously, I've seen everything from my dream job as a film critic to my faith in common sense and humanity deteriorate simply because the single greatest advancement in communications in the past century is now being used as a means to spout off misinformed, unintelligible dribble. And please don't get me started on how sites like PerezHilton, TheDrudgeReport, and TMZ have built multi-million dollar empires out of sullying journalistic integrity.

So why am I here? I wish I could say I am on a crusade to bring back validity to online writing, but again, I am not that arrogant (plus how do you even begin to save a lost cause?). My purpose, like most blogs, is self-serving. I have recently taken notice of just how powerful the internet can be in developing your voice, image, and how to best sell yourself to the greater public. You can even drum up business off it as several friends have proven (cough, cough, http://www.joecottrellphoto.com, http://www.davearmstrongart.com, http://www.drawingguy.com). I've recently been faced with a crossroads in my career and I've begun a year that will see some challenges, but will ultimately come with some great rewards. And as part of that I'm looking to further develop my style in writing pieces that are steeped in satire, wit, and observations about today's culture. You will see commentary on current affairs, editorials on pop culture, and humorous lists of otherwise useless crap that I find riveting. You will also occasionally see me use this site to pimp out other sites and comedians I am a fan of (cough, cough, http://www.11points.com, www,mikepolkjr.com).

Before we begin, a few points on myself:

• I am 28 years old and hold a journalism degree from Edinboro University


• I have a breadth of pop culture knowledge and make an excellent partner for bar trivia


• I am an award-winning writer, having spent the past three-and-a-half years as the Managing Editor for a regional publication that covered the tri-state region


• I hate "your mom" jokes but am not above making them


• I can tell you anything you need to know about the film exploits of James Bond


• The last album I listened to was National Ransom by Elvis Costello. I did not enjoy it as much as The Grey Album by DJ Danger Mouse


• I am not completely shut off to the idea of intelligent life outside of our planet, but I think they will be very disappointed in the human race if they choose to visit us now

Alright, that's enough for an introduction. I hope you keep following my exploits and please, share this link with all your friends. If you like my acerbic wit, then I'm assuming they will too - otherwise, why are they your friends?

And one last thing, this site is very much a work in progress. So if you hate the layout, colors, content, me...please be patient. I'm still trying to figure out what works best here. But trust me, we're going to have some fun.